A guy I used to work with called me a few weeks ago to ask about coaching and if it could work for him.
I started to ask him questions about himself.
I asked him what he wanted his life to be like and he said "I really need to think about that."
I asked him what matters to him and he said "I really need to think about that, too."
After a few rounds of this I told him that people who say they need to think about something often don't go think about it -- they've had years to think about it. No extra thinking comes from telling yourself you need to think about it, you just need to do the work.
We setup two hours and I coached him on what he wants his life to be like and what matters to him. No hiding, no ability to "go think about it" – just think about it right now and answer the questions.
In the course of those two hours we discovered that curiosity, friendship and other people matter most to him. In fact his entire life revolves around other people, but there were not enough other people in his life. He hadn't realized how much people were missing from his life until the call.
He left with a clear desire: more friends, and a clear action plan: to go ask the people closest to him what they like about him, what he should improve, and where he's holding himself back.
That was a month ago. Today we caught up again over zoom. He's a totally different person. Full of life, beaming, spending time with other people intentionally and building lots of new friendships, with a clearer sense of purpose and the beginnings of a mission – a mission that may even turn into his own company.
What a difference a few questions can make.
How about you? Have you been promising yourself that you would do something for months or years and never started? Maybe this can be the encouragement you need to get started.
P.S. I have a few spots open for one-to-one coaching clients. Learn more about working together.
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